A Blank Social State

When you walk into a bar/coffee shop, or other venue where people don’t know you, you end up being on display – and you never know who is watching, so walk in with a smile and confident body language.

The great thing about heading out to a bar or similar, is that you are a blank social state each and every time so it makes for a great opportunity to practice. In addition to your smile and body language, say hello or try to strike up a brief conversation with the first group you see.

If you’re at a bar, don’t hesitate to chat up the “wallflower” guys – it makes you look like you’re the ‘alpha’ or leader of those groups – male or female.

Failing and Succeeding

“I’ve failed over, over, and over again in my life. And that is why…..I succeed.” – Michael Jordan

Think about that for a moment… Are you sitting in limbo right now – studying this web site and others – waiting until you feel you have it all mastered before you get out there and wow the world (or just the woman or man next door). Stop jerking yourself around – you need real world practice – including the experience of failures.

Get out there right now – today or tonight. Go for a walk and chat up the first person you see!

Just Smile!

Be certain that you’re smiling… but just a ‘half smile’ – make it visible to those around you, but don’t be sporting a massive cheesy grin… make sure it’s not a ‘smirk’ either – an honest, genuine smile.

Now, as simple as that sounds, if you’ve never really been much for smiling in the past, you may think of yourself as smiling when in fact you aren’t – so, as silly as it sounds, get yourself in front of a mirror and do some practicing!

Too Many Precautions

The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions.

–Alfred Adler

If you’re worried about the outcome of approaching that cute girl or guy, then stop it!
Put absolutely no ‘terms’ on the outcome of your interaction and see how much better (and easier) it is!

The same goes for the majority of your other social interactions. Get out of your head and stop thinking about the possible outcome (which you’ll always consider negative), and just start your interactions!

Beer vs Water

Here’s a super simple tip for when you’re at the bar:

Instead of walking up to a woman with a beer in your hand, try it with a bottle (or glass) of water.

You’ll be surprised at how well a woman will respond to this and question what you’re drinking, or why it’s water. Many times a woman will “open” you in conversation making it that much easier!